Monday, November 4, 2013

Top 10 Movies of the 80's Summarized in One Sentence

80's Movies are the Best. There's no denying it. The era that brought us classics from John Hughes like Ferris Bueller's Day Off and Sixteen Candles can't even be compared to the sequel and prequel-driven soulless 3-D spectacles that Hollywood keeps churning out lately.

While you can debate what movies are truly the "Top 10", based on box office receipts or critical acclaim, I prefer to use my very own highly scientific method which basically boils down to choosing the ones I have personally watched (and rewatched) the most times. I think that is the most honest (and highly subjective) measurement of how great a movie is, don't you?

There's a whole generation of people walking around today (some with inexplicably baggy jeans, some with equally inexplicably fuzzy boots) who may not know how great and timeless these movies really are. I know no one has the time or attention span (thanks twitter) for full plot summaries anymore, so, for the benefit of present and future generations, I present to you the Coles-notes version of what these amazing movies are all about.

MY Top 10 Movies of the 80's Summarized in One Sentence

1. Sixteen Candles: Be nice to the nerds in high school because you never know when they'll be in a position to help you.

2. Ferris Bueller's Day Off: Youth is fleeting so be sure to take time to smell the roses/drive fast cars/sneak into restaurants/join a parade every once in a while.

3. The Breakfast Club: No matter how different you look on the outside, when you take the time to actually get to know someone, you'll always find you have something in common.

4. Stand By Me: The adventures you take with your childhood friends will be the most memorable and influential of your life.

5. When Harry Met Sally: Men and women can't be friends.

6. Back to the Future: Libyan terrorists will find you and shoot you if you make them a fake bomb and steal their plutonium so always, always wear a bullet proof vest.

7. The Goonies: The underdog who believes in pirates always wins against preppy capitalist meanies.

8. Top Gun: There is nothing sexier than shirtless men in tight jeans playing volleyball on a hot day.

9. Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back: It's a good idea to check your birth certificate because you might not know who your real father is.

10. Raiders of the Lost Ark: Don't mess with God or you'll get your face melted off.

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